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Operator : "Thank you for calling Pizza Galaxy Kholi . May I have your..."

Customer: "Hello, can I order.."

Operator : "Can I have your multi purpose card number first, Sir?"

Customer: "It's eh..., hold........ ..on..... .889861356102049 998-45-54610"

Operator : "OK... you're... Mr Singh and you're calling from 43rd Floor, Akask View Apt, Cantt Road, ........

Your home number is 4094! 2366, your office 76452302 and your mobile is
0142662566. Which number are you calling from now Sir?"

Customer: "Home! How did you get all my phone numbers?

Operator : "We are connected to the system Sir"

Customer: "May I order your Seafood Pizza..."

Operator : "That's not a good idea Sir"

Customer: "How come?"

Operator : "According to your medical records, you have high blood pressure and even higher cholesterol level Sir"

Customer: "What?... What do you recommend then?"

Operator : "Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. You'll like it"

Customer: "How do you know for sure?"

Operator : "You borrowed a book entitled "Popular Hokkien Dishes" from the National Library last week Sir"

Customer: "OK I give up... Give me three family size ones then, how much will that cost?"

Operator : "That should be enough for your family of 10, Sir. The total is Rs2249.99"

Customer: "Can I pay by credit card?"

Operator : "I'm afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card is over the limit and you owe your bank Rs10,720.55 since October last year.

That's not including the late payment charges on your housing loan, Sir."

Customer: "I guess I have to run to the neighbourhood ATM and withdraw some cash before your guy arrives"

Operator : "You can't Sir. Based on the records, you've reached your daily limit on machine withdrawal today"

Customer: "Never mind just send the pizzas, I'll have the cash ready. How long is it gonna take anyway?"

Operator : "About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can't wait you can always come and collect it on your scooter.. ."

Customer: " What!"

Operator : "According to the details in system, you own a Lambretta 1969 Vintage
Scooter,...registra tion number USE 8999..."

Customer: " ????"

Operator : "Is there anything else Sir?"

Customer: "Nothing... by the way... aren't you giving me that 3 free bottles of cola as advertised?"

Operator : "We normally would Sir, but based on your records you're also diabetic.... ... "

Customer: uh..err..err. .eh#$$^%&$@$%^

Operator : "Better watch your language Sir. Remember on 11th Nov 1986 you were convicted for using abusive language on a policeman who stopped you for driving through a one way, in fact you were driving a 1973 Ambassador bearing registration number UTD 4267.......

Customer: [Faints]

The way things are going, I won't be the least bit surprised if this actually happens in the future. :-)

You know what?

We're never really as important as we would like to believe.

We're all expendable, we're all replaceable.

True, some of us can be quite important relatively speaking, maybe if you're like, President of some superpower with a nuclear arsenal or CEO of a billion dollar business empire. But for the vast majority of us, in the grand scheme of things, we're just like every other schmo we meet in the street, desperately fighting a silent war against anonymity, against obscurity, even if it is within our own small spheres of existence, seeking to find our place in this world.

From day one we were always taught that we are special, that we are unique. That's actually quite true, but the supreme irony is that if everyone is unique, then uniqueness is nothing more than the ultimate equalizer, since being unique is absolute. No one can be "more unique" than others. In being different, in other words, we are all the same.

Some people have difficulty accepting this, and I've met quite a few of them in my life. There are those who wallow in the illusion that the world revolves around them, that they are truly more important than they really are. Of course, we know better.

It's not bad per se, to think this way. Everyone is entitled to his or her view on life. If some people would like to think of themselves as important, that is their business, and there is nothing fundamentally wrong with that. In fact I myself think like that at times, because it can be quite depressing to think otherwise. To consider one's self as a mere inconsequential piece of flesh walking aimlessly through life can have quite a negative effect on one's self-respect, and a little personal pride can go a long way in improving one's esteem.

However, what gets my goat at times are people who "force" you into living the illusion of their own personal importance. These are self-centered people who do nothing but live and breathe the rat-race of life, obsessed with furthering nothing but their own careers or other personal endeavors under the mistaken impression that they are better than everyone else. The clincher is, and I try to say this without being judgmental, that they are clearly not, and everyone but them realizes it.

Vanity can often lead people into overestimating their own personal worth whether in terms of competence, ability or some other aspect. These are people who refuse to, as Descartes may say, "know thyself", because if they did, they would probably realize their own weaknesses and failings as well. Everyone has their limits, and we should all learn to live with ours. If we set out to push our own limits, which is not a bad thing really and is in fact encouraged, we should be willing and able to bear the consequences of our own actions, and carry ourselves with grace regardless of what effects our actions may bring. The people I'm talking about couldn't care less about such consequences, as long as they partake the illusion of their own personal greatness.

These are poseurs who push clearly beyond their own abilities, and they try to sucker us into living in their own personal fantasy land. Take certain candidates for political office for example. Just because one is a popular actor or athlete, or bears the last name of a renowned politician does not necessarily imply an aptitude for politics. And yet, for some reason, they persist. Popularity tends to go a long way in this country, never mind ability. Witness the sheer number of celebrities elected to various public offices throughout the country. And while some of them manage to pull their own weight, a lot of them, especially those with little in the way of education, sad to say, hardly do anything at all, much less do something for the good of their constituents.

On a more personal nature, I've known people at work who purport to be intelligent, but lack communication, technical and/or decision making skills, yet they still think as if they can do no wrong, that when they speak, people should listen. Yeah right.

Outside work, there are those who would like to regale you with their career or personal exploits, or complain on how busy they are, but when you read between the lines, you arrive at the inescapable conclusion that they are in all likelihood lacking something between the ears. Yes I know, this opinion probably sounds harsh, but it's true, as I'm sure all of you can relate.

Besides, being busy does not necessarily connote intelligence or importance. Case in point, a hamster running on a hamster wheel. It may be running like a bat out of hell, but it's definitely going nowhere fast.

In a way intelligence or competence is like pornography. As the late U.S. Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart once said: "x x x But I know it when I see it." I may not be a pornographer or (arguably) a pornography addict, but I know porn when I see it. The same way I may not be that intelligent myself, but I know intelligence when I see it. And sad to say, some who purport to have it, simply don't.

For these individuals, I have some unsolicited advice. Know your limits. And keep your illusions to yourselves.

Sometimes, more important than intelligence or competence, is how we treat our fellow men. We may not all be big shots, but kindness and justice are often remembered, regardless of how smart we are, or what we end up as.

A little self-introspection can go a long way. Temet nosce.

But if you insist on living your illusions...well, talk to the hand. :-)

Starlight
Muse

Far away
This ship is taking me far away
Far away from the memories
Of the people who care if I live or die

Starlight
I will be chasing the starlight
Until the end of my life
I don't know if it's worth it anymore

Hold you in my arms
I just wanted to hold
You in my arms

My life
You electrify my life
Let's conspire to re-ignite
All the souls that would die just to feel alive

But I'll never let you go
If you promised not to fade away
Never fade away

Our hopes and expectations
Black holes and revelations
Our hopes and expectations
Black holes and revelations

Hold you in my arms
I just wanted to hold
You in my arms

Far away
This ship is taking me far away
Far away from the memories
Of the people who care if I live or die

And I'll never let you go
If you promise not to fade away
Never fade away

Our hopes and expectations
Black holes and revelations
Our hopes and expectations
Black holes and revelations

Hold you in my arms
I just wanted to hold
You in my arms
I just wanted to hold

The best kind of "do" ever. :-)

It's been a couple of weeks since I last posted an entry. I dunno. I guess my heart just wasn't in it.

It's not as if I have nothing to write about. In fact I have a lot of pending posts, as well as a lot more ideas in my head, just waiting to be translated into blog posts. But for some reason, I couldn't get myself to start or finish any of them.

Maybe it's blogger's fatigue, if anything like that exists. I've been fighting it off for several months now, but I suppose this is my worst attack. Almost three weeks without any new post. It was bound to happen I guess, I've been blogging for almost three years now, and sometimes...it just becomes a chore. Failing to update my blog has its negative effects, as my number of visitors has gone way, way down. But it can't be helped.

So what now? Is this a prelude to quitting blogging altogether? Probably not. I'm not into it at this time, but it doesn't mean that I'm quitting. I probably need some time to get my head back together again.

To those who keep visiting hoping for an update, my apologies. I'll get back to updating this thing soon enough, when I get rid of the kinks in my system.

Belated Happy Valentine's Day!

And belated Happy Chinese New Year to everyone. :-)